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If you’re anything like these it girls, you should probably not adopt animals

If you’re anything like these it girls, you should probably not adopt animals

Animals and humans have always had a complicated relationship. As personal injury lawyers, we’ve examined many different circumstances surrounding dog bite incidents. As it stands, we could only guess at dogs’ (and other animals’) motives for biting a human — not that we’ve ever needed to put a dog on trial. In Washington, owners are liable for their dog’s bites whether or not they’re aware of their dog’s viciousness. In other words, all the blame goes to the dog owner.

On the other hand, it is often much easier to understand why humans behave the way they do toward animals. That’s not necessarily the case with these it girls who, despite mounting evidence of their incapacity to keep a creature healthy and/or alive, insisted on adopting pets.

“Self-made” billionaire Kylie Jenner’s starved-looking greyhound

When determining dog bite liability, it’s not uncommon to identify and factor in the dog’s breed. So if the offending dog is a German shepherd, a rottweiler, or of any breed that is highly represented in biting incidents, there’s one thing less to ponder.

It’s safe to say, then, that Kylie Jenner’s Italian greyhound is not a biter. Italian greyhounds are known to be elegant, amiable, and relaxed and don’t ask much of their owner other than to be hugged. They also need to be fed, something Ms. Jenner needs to be reminded of.

In 2015, the extremely rich woman posted an Instagram video featuring her greyhound that looked a little too skinny (read: undernourished). So skinny was the hound that its vertebrae and ribs were visible through its thin fur.

The LA County Department of Animal Care and Control found no signs of neglect, however, and Ms. Jenner had once again won. It is unlikely she’ll ever be held liable in a dog bite incident because her greyhound is not going to want to bite into anything other than dog chow.

Does Paris Hilton bling-out her pets or are her pets the bling?

Film and recording artist Paris Hilton is a prolific pet owner. But is she collecting animals because she’s charitable or because they look fabulous dangling from her clutch?

Despite being an avid collector, Ms. Hilton is apparently not very caring toward her pets, according to insiders. One of her alleged crimes was abandoning her pet cat Prada at the vet’s, as well as not having him neutered within the prescribed period. Fortunately, the Kris Kelly Foundation, the shelter that let her adopt the cat, came to Prada’s rescue.

The hotel heiress was also rumored to have a habit of leaving pets in the closet. That’s okay — she only leaves in the closet those that she no longer likes (it’s not okay).

Interestingly, Ms. Hilton had been a victim of “regular” and exotic animal bites herself. If she had obtained our services to be her personal injury lawyers for her animal bite incident, we would have done more than ensure she got a fair claim; we would have advised her to just stay away from animals. Or, at the very least, refrain from using them as a keychain for her purses.

Lena Dunham is not that kind of pet owner

Like Paris, writer/actress Lena Dunham has had pets. One of those “lucky” creatures is Lamby, a shaggy-haired pooch that, according to Lena, had a tendency to be violent and aggressive. And when she could no longer stand the dog’s ruff behavior, she gave it away to a Los Angeles facility that takes care of dogs with special needs.

Sounds reasonable, right? The Brooklyn Animal Rescue Coalition (BARC), the shelter where Lena got Lamby, didn’t think so.

BARC called out the actress for giving the pet to a different shelter when the pooch’s mood no longer aligned with her domestic rules. BARC claimed that Lamby was wild-mannered and stated that the actress was in breach of the adoption agreement. Like any reasonable celebrity, Ms. Dunham responded by posting a drawing of Lamby on Instagram, with a lengthy caption that basically said “Sorry, not sorry.”

Was Lena cruel by giving away Lamby to a different shelter? Well, that’s up fur debate.

Kim Kardashian: Kitty killer?

Not known for animal rights activism, best-selling author Kim K.-West can add being responsible for the death of a kitty to her very long list of accomplishments. The kitty in question was Mercy, a gift from Kim’s famous husband. Unfortunately, Kim’s allergies revolted against the puss.

So Kim decided to give Mercy to her hairdresser. Only four months old, poor Mercy suffered from a cancer-like virus often associated with inbreeding and died.

Like her former employer and mentor Paris, Mrs. West would be well served to avoid such catastrophes in the future by not buying from a breeder and just sticking to her creative pursuits — like releasing the second volume of her book of selfies.

Got bitten by a dog? Consult Seattle personal injury attorneys Buckingham, LaGrandeur, & Williams to learn how you can get compensated.